So I bought a Silhouette, and it was like the greatest day ever. Excitement poured rampant through my veins, and I lived on Cloud 9 for about 3.2 hours. Which was roughly the time it took to realize I had NO IDEA HOW TO WORK THE THING.
I’ve had dreams (literally) of owning a Silhouette for months now; and I actually bought one over Christmas last year…but then returned it immediately because the multitude of monogramming possibilities just shut my mind flat down. But that was six months ago now, and last week I decided to be brave enough to try this one more time.
Once I got it home, I assumed it would be self-explanatory, and I would probably just have to push a button. Instead, I pushed all the buttons and nothing happened. I was so mad at that dumb machine that I actually wondered if there was such a thing as Silhouette Therapy.
There’s not. I checked. But there is such a thing as YouTube, and all these crafty experts show you how to do magical things.
So I watched one video after another. And then I watched a few more.
And two main things occurred to me:
1. You can watch as many YouTube Tutorials as you have hairs on your head, but that will not automatically equip you with the ability to apply the skills you’ve seen demonstrated.
I proved that true when, after hours of instructive teaching, I still ruined about 3 yards of vinyl before I got a single thing right. (Larry says that it takes time to learn new things, so I’m hoping he’ll remember this when he sees how much vinyl costs.)
2. I momentarily thought I must be living Ephesians 3:20 out in real life. The Message translation of this verse says, “God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams!”
And, well, I figured it was true in this case because never in my wildest imaginations did I think I would spend so much time on crafts. But I’m pretty sure I’m stretching that verse a bit, because something tells me the Apostle Paul wasn’t talking about crafting issues.
I finally decided I either needed serious therapy, or at least some help from an expert crafter. Thankfully, my baseball mom friend, Jen, and her sister, Leslie, are like Silhouette black belts, so I called Jen in a panic; and she promptly diagnosed me over FaceTime. They basically got me all straightened out, so that I could cut vinyl to my heart’s content.
Ironically, I was convinced that I was dealing with a manufacturing error in the Silhouette, but no. It turned out to be user error, to the surprise of No One. Apparently you can watch all sorts of how-to videos, but when you fail to insert the cutting mat correctly, your machine will not work. #AmIReallyWritingAboutThis?
Now that it’s all figured out, this purchase is arguably my best ever. Which is fantastic because this is the second semi-costly crafting device that I’ve recently bought with the rational (to Larry of course) that it’s an investment in my business.
I haven’t quite determined what business that is yet, and Larry threatens to pull the funding and resign his role as my venture capitalist if I can’t define that critical piece of information soon. (I’m actually being dramatic. I haven’t spent that much, and shockingly, Larry has agreed to each purchase without any official research required.) (Let’s just go ahead and call that a Work of the Divine.)
Frankly, I just like to play with wood and words and paint; and I have this idea that one day, I might sell some stuff. My banker likely won’t view this as a cash cow anytime soon or never; but I’m certain he’s not expecting to get rich off crafts anyway.
The important thing is: I’ve got a Silhouette, and I know how to use it. So there’s that.
And as always, I’m so glad we had this talk. Hopefully you’ll come back when you need a dose of mind-numbing banality. (We’ve always got some in stock.) (You know, in that business of mine.)
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